1. United States
  2. N.J.
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POTUS: Japan loves surprises! Me: Let me off the ride now

To: Sen. Booker, Sen. Kim, Rep. Kean

From: A verified voter in Budd Lake, NJ

March 20

O… M… G… Have y’all heard the hot goss? So, my sister’s neighbor’s cousin’s friend’s coworker’s dog walker said that her brother’s boss’s nephew’s professor’s daughter works at the White House and she heard that Trump told a journalist that he didn’t alert the allies to his actions against Iran beforehand because he thought they- specifically Japan- loved surprises. And then- wait for it- he asked the reporter why Japan didn’t notify HIM before Pearl Harbor!?!? Like, forrealzzz- aside from the fact that Japan was not an ally in WWII, and that Pearl Harbor is IN the United States, and that Trump was not president or even, you know, like, born yet- it was a total gotcha moment, right? So eloquent. So educated. So stately. English must have been trump’s most best subject, amiright? Like, for sure. And since I’m not totally reassured that Congress understands anything, let alone sarcasm, I feel like I should note that NONE OF THE ABOVE IS SOMETHING TO BE PROUD OF!!! Get him out of the Oval Office NOW. Replace him with someone with at LEAST a sixth grade understanding of civics. WE THE PEOPLE are ASHAMED and EMBARRASSED on the national stage. And you sit there doing nothing.

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