1. United States
2. Wash.
3. Letter

How US politics feels right now: COACH: ok team I know that we're currently down on points but I really think that— PLAYER: hey uh coach it looks like the red team is currently shitting into their open palms and throwing literal poop at us COACH: —with the power of friendship and teamwork we can rally and move the ball downfield— PLAYER: and now they're just punching random people in the crowd... thaaaat can't be sanitary COACH: —might be able to score again before the clock runs out— PLAYER: the good news is they've stopped punching us. the bad news is they have knives now. COACH: —not hopeless guys. with a little luck we might be able to tie the game up— PLAYER: hey are the refs going to do anything about this? where the fuck are the refs?? COACH: —only 27 points down let's really dig deep next quarter team and— PLAYER: welp the refs have knives now too COACH: —chip in $5.00 each to my lunch money fund— PLAYER: ok but coach now they're holding the scorekeeper hostage at gunpoint. yeah they just gave themselves a million gajilliondy points and reset our score to... "negative F minus your mom"? what the fuck does that even mean? Is that a number?? COACH: —certainly write a strongly worded letter to the franchise owner about proper sportsmanship— PLAYER: aaaaaand they've set the field on fire.