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Grab a crayon, sir. Today’s lesson is prioritization.

To: Pres. Trump

From: A verified voter in Budd Lake, NJ

April 2

Good morning! I heard a rumor that you stated that you cannot focus on Medicaid and Medicare right now because of your wars. Is that correct? It’s ok, buddy. Lots of us out here have adhd, and we can walk you through it! The first thing you have to do is find a quiet space where you can concentrate. Pour yourself a cup of herbal tea- maybe lavender lemon for the relaxation, and maybe a little aloe water on top for the sun burn? Oh- you paint it that way on purpose? My bad. You can nix the aloe. Put on some relaxing music or background sounds. I prefer the sound of rushing water when I do this, but I’m pretty sure you’d prefer the soundtrack to something a little more upbeat- like maybe “The Purge,” or “World War Z” or perhaps an AI rendition of the screams of people suffering in Hell? Whatever works. Once you are calm and relaxed, take a notebook and p̶e̶n̶, crayon? Whatever they let you write with over there. Make a short list of what’s most important to your job. Hint- world domination should not be on this list. Perhaps it could say “war, famine, healthcare, taxing billionaires,” and then I want you to assign numbers to these things in order of importance. Do you see where I’m going here? War should not be #1. Then focus on one issue at a time. If you put healthcare as #1, you solve that -and only that- first. Get it? And when all the things you were hired to fix are fixed, then maybe you and I can play a game of Battleship or Stratego! Ok good buddy. Good luck!

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