1. United States
2. Calif.
3. Letter

Dear President Trump, Congratulations on your trip to Asia — a resounding success in the world of unintentional comedy. The highlight? Dancing like a confused animatronic puppet in front of diplomats who looked more alarmed than impressed. You proudly claimed to meet “Mr. Toyota.” Quick fact check: he’s dead. Been dead. You didn’t meet him. You probably saw a logo and called it a summit. You boasted that Toyota would invest billions in the U.S. — Toyota immediately denied it. So either you’re lying, delusional, or Toyota ghosted you mid-fantasy. Either way, it’s pathetic. Then you declared that criticizing your overseas train wreck was “almost treason.” Really? That’s what traitors do now — point out how embarrassing you are? You might want to re-read the Constitution (you know, that pesky document you treat like toilet paper). We have the First Amendment. You don’t get to silence people just because your ego gets a paper cut every time someone laughs at you — which, let’s be honest, is daily. You are the worst ambassador America has ever sent abroad — and we’ve had some truly bad ones. But none of them confused car brands with people or declared war on satire. The only treason happening here is what you’re doing to the dignity of the office. You’re a disgrace, a joke, and a national security hazard with an orange spray tan. Enjoy the plane ride home. Maybe next time, skip the dance. Sincerely, An American with functioning brain cells